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Anita Estrada"[The depression] really became more obvious, more of an issue, when I got in my late teens and early 20s.I was diagnosed with depression when I was in my early 20s — depression with atypical anxiety — and then, when I had my first suicide attempt, they changed [my diagnosis] to bipolar disorder.
"I'm also a survivor of nine years of self-injury and a suicide attempt catalyzed by an emotionally and physically abusive relationship." Stage was compelled to action not only by her own struggle with mental illness and self-harm, she says, but also by the loss of friends to suicide and the egregious lack of resources available to suicide-attempt survivors in this country.He just decided, 'I’m gonna be mad at Natasha — no matter what she does or what she says, I’m just gonna be mad at her.' I started crying and I told him that he was making everything worse and that I was going to kill myself, and since we’d said it so many times before, he was just like, 'Whatever, whatever'..."I really felt worthless, and I really felt like I didn’t deserve to be alive and all the things were true and that... I just thought that I was a horrible person and the only way to not be horrible [was] to die... I chose after I graduated from college 'cause of the whole Asian familial pressures of being a scientist or a doctor."Even if your friend or your girlfriend or whatever always says, 'I’m gonna kill myself, I’m gonna kill myself,' you should take her seriously and not say, 'Oh, that’s something you always say.'"Suzanne Miller"I was upper-middle-class — probably the wealthiest of my whole friend group — and went to private school and went to summer camps in the summer. I thought, 'I at least have to go to college and then end it,' for some odd reason.With , Stage provides a platform for the people behind these numbers and amplifies the stories — the devastating, diverse, uplifting, uncertain, hopeful, despairing, healing stories — of those who have survived attempted suicide.Click through to meet 15 of these individuals.: If you’re feeling suicidal, please talk to somebody.National Suicide Prevention Week runs from September 7-13, 2015.
If you or someone you care about is thinking about suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or the Suicide Crisis Line at 1-800-784-2433. Stage Googled "suicide survivor." "What I found," she shares on her website, "was people who had lost someone they loved, not people like me, who had tried to die and lived instead — people who were confused about what happened next, who felt so much shame that they couldn't talk about what had happened to them, people who felt misunderstood and alone." Stage knew firsthand that isolation could be deadly.
Today, life expectancy is higher than it's ever been, but the suicide rate is on the rise — perhaps indicating that our country's mental-health management is lagging behind the rest of medicine.
Dismantling the stigma around suicide is a literal matter of life and death for tens of thousands of people: Some 40,000 Americans die by suicide every year.
There’s the baby blues, which makes it sound like it’s no big deal, but there’s degrees of it clear up to what they consider postpartum psychosis, where it can get really bad."Nicole Keimer"When you have a problem with food, you can’t just stop eating and cut food out of your life. I fully woke up in the ambulance in terrible pain — terrible pain. That became the hardest thing to cope with — my own self-image and trying to rebuild that.
So, there was a time period where I thought, 'I’m never going to get out of this. It took me a long time to do it, but in the end, I found part of myself again."Dese'Rae L.
I swear to god, they pulled it straight out of the 1950s, 1960s. That is how the majority of psychiatric hospitals are treated. They drug them into their own particular forms of oblivion, and when it’s decided that they are no longer a danger to themselves or others, they are then released back out into society, generally with no actual help because that, of course, is the best way to keep people alive."I have heard horror stories of people going to psych wards in tears, truly terrified that they are, in fact, going to kill themselves, and being turned away because the staff there has decided they don’t have a 'real' mental illness. And, I just didn’t care about any of it."Everything, really, in our family was about my mom. I started figuring out who I wanted to save: the Tile that I didn’t want to be gone."For me, in the moments after I had actually done everything that I had been planning for so long, I realized that I didn’t want to die. I also thought I wouldn’t be able to be happy in this life, because I had this horrible secret that I couldn’t tell them, because they were just so fucking religious, and I believed it... "So, probably from like 4 to 24, I was really depressed.