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Dating women who are separated

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In the midst of a separation, especially if many other people want that relationship to keep going, he may be overwhelmed with indecision and unable to see clearly what is best.

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That is especially true if the new relationship can threaten the other partner’s potential access to resources or loss of what they have.When they are initially back together, they often feel a renewed attachment and often don’t want to deal with the reasons they so often split up.As those problem must eventually re-emerge, the subsequent breakups are likely to happen more quickly.This is one of the most common dilemmas my patients have brought to me over the past four decades.Though there are multiple variations on the theme, there is one way in which they all are similar: two women are in a competitive triangle with the same man.A man in grief, angry, unhinged, or feeling newly free of cumulative stress can be a vulnerable target for an outside person, or even an unthinking seeker of temporary escape.

People in unstable situations often make in-the-moment decisions that have nothing to do with what they may need or want as time elapses.

A newly separated partner is often searching for validation and support and cannot see beyond those needs.

If, on the other hand, a couple has been separated for quite a while, have made multiple attempts to reconnect and failed, the partners may have come to the conclusion that divorce is inevitable.

In either case, a relationship they begin while being separated is just another kind of infidelity.

Men who do not find themselves ever satisfied with only one woman are clearly not likely candidates to change that behavior in the future.

The man in those unfinished relationships may be temporarily available to a new partner, but is highly likely to go back to his other relationship.