Dating rules for my future self episode 1
The first thing to do when you find yourself attracted to a shy man is to question your feelings for him.In other words, ask yourself "Am I attracted in spite of or because of his shyness? A very close friend of mine is extremely shy, and I know plenty of other guys that are shy. Shy guys, almost by definition, do not have the balls to initiate and pursue women.
So, if you do choose to initiate, do so only during the early stages of dating, that is, until he builds his confidence and comfort around you." If you answer these questions sincerely and still want to date him, you then face the problem of making it happen - or rather, making him make it happen. They fall outside of the predator-prey model for sexual interactions that is assumed in the "don't initiate contact" rule.So it is acceptable for you to initiate with a shy guy. The problem with male shyness is that it wears off in specific situations.That offense will reflect negatively on you and the relationship.So be careful about how much (and which) initiative you take.If a girl doesn't approach or initiate contact with a shy man, nothing will happen.
This is true, but handling this situation isn't as simple as you might think...
Of course, he will question this over and over in his mind, wondering whether you were asking him to hang out just to be friends, or if you wanted something more.
So show him that you want something more - ask repeatedly.
A shy man may never become courageous enough to approach women in general, but he can eventually grow comfortable with a girlfriend or wife.
As the fear of the unknown dissipates with increased familiarity, a shy man's confidence in his interactions with you will rise.
Unfortunately there is no quantifiable or simple rule here, as his threshold for embarrassment will vary in proportion to his shyness and his pride, which are different in every man. Well, for starters, in the early stages, you will need to give him blatant signs of your interest.