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Dating dummies

Kim Taehyung’s just that weirdo kid who cuts holes into his sweaters, runs into doors on a daily basis and just happens to be in all of Jeongguk's classes since first grade. ” he denies a little too strongly for it to comfort Jeongguk. ” He’s been wondering if that was what this is about. “Staying home to watch movies with you sounds better than any party.” Jesus Christ. It’s just a phone,” Taehyung says, sounding mildly petulant.He's just stupid, naive little Taehyung whose sole purpose in life is to follow Jeongguk around and make him miserable with his endless space theories and dramatic monologues. He’s turned down Taehyung’s invitations to numerous social events it’s practically a habit now. He still doesn’t understand how Taehyung can manage to say things like that with a straight face and not regret every life choice he’s made so far. He’s taken completely by surprise that he reels back, confused.

Jiminie @youngbaefan88 @iamthebest01 @kingyoongi @rapgod94 @hobistyle @pinklover92 EMRGENCY OMG TAEHYUNG HAZ BF WTF??!?!?He looks up, startled, and sees a sheepish looking Taehyung holding the phone away from him. Or what constitutes for something awful in Kim Taehyung’s vocabulary. Taehyung’s face isn’t visible but Jeongguk can clearly see the other guy’s side profile.He thinks he could be forgiven for spacing out for a second because ” he splutters indignantly. Taller than Taehyung, messy hair, glasses, elegant nose, jawline that could cut glass, physique of a god, looks stupidly enchanted by whatever Taehyung is saying…okay, so basically everything Jeongguk hates in a person. He should know better than to accept links from Park Jimin.Taehyung doesn’t give it back like he expected him to, just keeps half-hiding it behind him. I can help you download it on your phone,” he offers. @youngbaefan88 those pictures prove nothing @iamthebest01 denial isn’t just a river in the amazon guk kekeke~ @youngbaefan88 that’s not even the right country, it’s supposed to be Egypt dumbass @iamthebest01 SAME DIFFERENCE Lord Namjoon @rapgod94 @youngbaefan88 @kingyoongi @iamthebest01 @hobistyle @pinklover92 Methinks the gentleman doth protest too much jiminie Jeon Jeongguk @iamthebest01 @rapgod94 @youngbaefan88 @kingyoongi @hobistyle @pinklover92 Stop pretending to be posh, you’re from ilsan Jeon Jeongguk @[email protected] @youngbaefan88 @kingyoongi @hobistyle @pinklover92 TAEHYUNG HIMSELF SAID HE DOESN’T HAVE A BOYFRIEND.DROP IT Jiminie @[email protected] @rapgod94 @kingyoongi @hobistyle @pinklover92 Did he actually say he didn’t go out on a date with anyone…?It promotes dishonesty and slander among loudmouthed asshole high schoolers who think they know everything when they actually know nothing.

He regrets it immediately though because the next tab open is those pictures of Taehyung on a “date” with this bozo.

He’s always been mildly aware that Taehyung does indeed have a life outside of catering to Jeongguk’s every whim but this is the first time he’s actually been slapped in the face by this fact. Friends should tell each other when they (plan to stab them in the back) start dating. Your grades aren’t high enough for you to get away with that.” Taehyung shrugs, apparently unconcerned that his future is at stake here. Because even with Jeongguk’s Spartan tutoring his grades in algebra last year were appalling and definitely hurt his chances of going to a good college. He hates that look—he can never really figure out what he’s thinking when he’s got his poker face on. Jeongguk helps him with everything, especially sports.

Especially dating people who look like they could convince Taehyung to go back to his room for sex and then toss him out on the street once they got off. “It’s okay, Hongbin can help me out.” Jeongguk zeroes in on the unfamiliar name. “A friend who helps me out.” “ the friend who helps you out,” he grumbles. Granted, he’s not getting straight A’s in math subjects either, but he’s passable enough. You’re a bad influence on Tae.” He throws a glare at his cousin when Jimin only scoffs.

To be fair, the first thing he does note is how atrocious his cousin's spelling and grammar have become since he started hanging out with that grumpy old man next door (“I’m fucking 19, you little shit,” Yoongi screeches from a distance).

It takes a while before the actual context of the short but concise message hit him like a ton of Hoseok's fastballs.

By the fourth ring Jeongguk feels 120% more annoyed because (1) Kim Taehyung always answers his calls by the second ring and (2) is the world ending or something Taehyung's voice chirps excitedly and a little breathlessly from the other end, and Jeongguk feels his hackles rising up in an instant. There better be no strange men in his bedroom right now or he is going to have a long talk with Mr. " Jeongguk rolls his eyes because Taehyung says it like Jeongguk hasn't been coming over for dinner at the Kim residence since he was 12. “When have I ever let you watch that stupid show alone? Expect me in 15.” Jeongguk frowns at his phone for a long second after they hang up. Whatever he is, he's not going to be good for Taehyung and it's like Jeongguk's the only one who realizes it. Jeongguk has never been that big of a fan of zombies so he has no problem ignoring the latest episode of TWD in favor of observing Taehyung. Something big and probably important because Taehyung normally doesn’t make a fuss about anything.