Cognitive therapy dating
"I'm not saying people shouldn't be discriminating.
Based on her work in the area of relationships, and through extensive research on more than 5,000 single people, Dr Lukats has identified the five main dating toxins as: shyness, low self-esteem, fussiness, lack of opportunity and desperation.Fortunately, there is help at hand in the form of a new programme she has dubbed the Dating Detox.The treatment is a combination of cognitive behavioural therapy techniques, psychoanalysis and new dating etiquette.It's the run-up to Christmas, and seemingly everywhere you look there are couples kissing under mistletoe or strolling along hand-in-hand, bundled up in scarves and gloves like the living embodiment of a Disney happy ending. There are 13million singletons in the UK, and recent research by online dating service Parship shows that 5.6million of them haven't been on a date for the past six months or had a relationship in more than a year.Scroll down for more For those who are dating, the prospects are not much brighter."I find that people tend to remember how they feel at the end of the exercise rather than the beginning, especially as it is usually a very positive experience.
"Obviously, each individual's treatment is different as it is personalised according to their problem areas." In terms of the most prevalent 'toxins' Dr Lukats says that low self-esteem, desperation and lack of opportunity are common in both men and women. How do they see themselves in five years' time, and so on." Interestingly, it seems that shyness is more of a problem for men.
"When working towards your goals, the trick is to break things down into manageable tasks.
"If you are introverted you could start with something easy such as saying good morning to your colleagues, and gradually moving on to harder exercises.
But this is for people who don't have any mental health issues.
"This treatment is for anyone who wants to try new techniques to help them improve their chances of finding a happy relationship." With speed-dating, chat rooms and internet dating, actually getting a date is not really the problem.
This can make them feel more pressured." On the other hand, women tend to be more fussy.